April 16, 2010

The Lost Art of "Having Coffee"

I think there is a lost art in many societies in the world.
Very often the western world, especially America.
Maybe I am mistaken.

I have noticed a part of my life here in Mozambique that I have grown to love brings back childhood memories from a slower, simplier time in life. The first 8 years of my life I grew up in a very small town of New Brunswick, Canada. Although I don't remember a lot, I do remember that my mom and her best friend, Judy knew how to have coffee. My mom would just randomly drop by Judy's house and vice versa so they could visit, chat and have coffee. There was no need for a formal reason, a formal phone call or waiting for an invitation or a response to see if they could fit into each others weekly schedule. It was just time for friends to check in on each other, take time out of their day for one another and be together.

Here in Mozambique it is much the same. People have time for coffee with one another.
There are things to do but relationships hold priority.
Maybe it is because most of us have only each other for family or we do not have many places to go.
I don't know, I only know that I love having coffee with friends.

This has not always been the case with me.
My goodness, I hardly drank coffee until I came to Africa.
I didn't have time for it. I didn't really like it.
But suddenly, I find myself loving it but maybe it's the connection I love more than the actual coffee
(although I can really enjoy a hazelnut flavored coffee with vanilla creamer and sugar).

One of the things that frustrated me last time I returned to the States was I felt like no one had time for coffee. Like I said I wasn't much of a coffee drinker then but it seemed no one had time to visit, to share life, to just chat and be with one another. I wanted to scream outloud, "Don't you all know how important we are meant to be to one another?.....take time for each other....love one another....be real with each other."
I wasn't judging, just really saddened.

I know life is busy. I know there are commitments. I know there are activites. I know, I know, I know....
But should life ever be so busy that we don't have time for relationships with people.
Isn't that what life is all about?

When is the last time you dropped in on your friend for coffee unexpectedly just to see how she is doing?

1 comment:

Karen said...

You have no comments here, so maybe I will be the first. I clicked into your blog through Ben's Facebook, actually, this morning, Craig "asked to be my friend" so I was just checking out the Pavkov family's stuff and came across your blog.
Let me introduce myself as a cousin! haha...too many pavkov cousins! Marc might know me or my siblings. Anyway, we have been living in Paraguay for 19 years and I totally understand your thoughts in this blog. In Paraguay people gather to drink tereré, a cool refreshing tea sipped from a straw. Its a social time to connect and visit. There is always time for tereré. I also noticed back in the states that there is no time for visits.
One shocker for me was when a lady from church was struggling to feed her 5 kids milk and bread, and on the first day of our visit back to the states I saw vanilla coke. I was so angry! Flavored coke! can you believe it? and this poor lady didn't even have enough to buy milk.
Okay, nice to "visit" with you.
...a pavkov cousin,